Great, Thanks for Asking. Also my spouse and I have given each other full permission to use the other one as an excuse whenever needed. Or why do I feel entitled to her presence and her company? 22. Making conversions . You? and see if he gets stuck in a loop. Leisure time is notI give up my leisure time to hem her pants or help her move back from college or make her dinner. No matter how old you are, you don't want to be badgered about your life choices. 3. Can't complainI have tried, but no one listens. If someone asks me the question, I am happy, because that means they are probably inviting me somewhere. Ive noticed that sometimes when coworkers as me what Im doing theyre really just politely trying to start a conversation about the weekend so they can tell me all about their exciting weekend plans. You're going to want to keep your messages quite a bit shorter on apps like Tinder and Bumble .) Catching up on sleep, doing chores, spending time with my partner. In every group Ive been in it is socially acceptable and expected that you can say youre busy for whatever reason you want. Funnily enough, my co-workers are also doing laundry. This is about the blandest, most banal small talk question I can think of.). No matter how old you are, you don't want to be badgered about your life choices. But when asking, I still tend to ask in layers so the other person has many outs to either say no or express no. Me: Nope. ? comments. You are never going to stop hearing this question from relative strangers and new acquaintances, but I think with close friends or family, you should be able to say to them the next time, you know Im a pretty straightforward person; if you want to invite me to something you can just ask me directly. or some variation thereof. Bonus points if you say something that makes zero sense, but you end up getting your family to look at you like a genius anyway.
Funny Responses to "What Are You Doing?" - Mom Advice Line Good luck! Obviously Im talking here about people Im friendly with, not friend-friends, but I cant imagine having got to the stage of being friends with someone who was inclined to rebuff me expressing interest in their life. Once upon a time I had a friend. I dont remember why anymore but at some point I agreed to share my google calendar with this friend. I think the idea at first was to make it easier to plan hangouts. Mentioning your actual plans is one. It makes you feel like whatever you do, you are expected to conform to being othered. Born and bred in southern California, how are you? asked of/by a stranger functions, for me, like any scripted greeting, pretty comparable to an all right with or without the interrogative in that a detailed (or even particularly honest) response is not expected and in many cases wont be acknowledged because it wont be heard (because no one is listening for it). Good to know! The lines of dominance and power are what make this a problem. 2.
#1078: "Sooooooowhat are you doing this weekend?" I dont find it weird, I think its just whiteness and the safest thing to do is presume white people are going to be like this to some extent, until they prove otherwise. TootsNYC, thanks for responding and considering what is said. If I had a tail, I would wag it! (I know that I dont want to is in fact a perfectly valid excuse. An alternative then is to actually mention the fact that you are sending them an email. I think the reason is that telling people about fun things is potentially fairly personal. What are you doing for dinner? And then if its something I dont want to do BUT its a person I dont want to discourage, I can say, That sounds like youll have fun! I ask what are your plans for the weekend? *overwhelmingly* more often because Im genuinely curious: then they ask me, and we talk about our hobbies (or I say not much and we agree that laying around is nice.) Is it just me? Paris color stylo eye shadow neon skirt Paris color riche le stylo eye shadow bronzed How much vitamin c does a clementine have Loreal paris color riche stylo smoky eye avant azure What to get a guy for valentine's day Paris stylo smoky eye shadow hollywood Why is friendship better than relationship Desculpa para sair mais cedo do trabalho View Each Day as an Opportunity, Not an Obligation, Everything That You Can't do Because You Have Kids. I have not observed him asking this many questions to other bank customers, not that I hang out in there much, and maybe they give him more satisfactory/interesting answers). See how thats all about you, and your kids, and not at all about her? Amazing what showering can do for you. Copyright 2011 thru 2023 Jennifer Peepas, all rights reserved. I know theyre just trying to be friendly but it gets exhausting that starting Wednesday I have to deal with so what are you up to this weekend and then AGAIN on Monday what did you do this weekend? (So I guess Tuesday is the only day safe from that question, ha. Since LW was talking about very short-term questions, I certainly hope no one is asking because they need to tell the caterer! Where I live, in Sweden, you can ask your family, friends, coworkers etc How are you? and the reply would typically be somewhere between Its good and Im a litte tired because the baby has a cold, but otherwise things are good, but never Kind of bad, my depression is making life really dark right now (at least not when used as a small-talk question). I am sure this is going to get attacked for scaremongering and concern-trolling, but I mean, yeah. 1 Keeping It Real I am currently out of the office on vacation. Oh thanks capn for the hilarious answers!!! Im talking about the OMG, how can you feel that way?! Other commenters have given great scripts.
79 Funny And Flirty Response To "I Hate You" Better Responses Theyre so nice and interested, they cant possibly be racist/microaggressive! Yeah, my parents did that too. To read all future answers to your comment, please bookmark this page. Lessons in Love from Julia Roberts Movies true tho like next t inme ill say this and it will. Why not be honest? Good luck. I had a two-day conversation with my cat about vacuums versus lint rollers. Why do you ask, why, is something happening, and why, whats up are different answers that extend the convo while not telling porkies. Ive learned also that its ok to be a deer in the headlights if Im caught off guard bc I can always invent something shortly after or next day and say whoops forgot I had x. So finding out if you have plans at a given time becomes an underhanded way of tricking you into agreeing to something, like LW mentions in point number 2. To me, thats pretty manipulative and when its done I generally conclude that its done on purpose. Updog. Or, if I tell a potential date some generic things (oh, probably reading and writing a lot) and add that Id like to take a break so they know Im open, Im engaging in the same coy behavior thats bothering me in the first place. Our college was selling cheap tickets for an outdoor ice skating event. So with someone new, Did you do anything good last weekend? "Weekends are days to refuel your soul and to be grateful for the blessings that you have." - Anonymous 2. Its just in the past year or so that its cropped up repeatedly, with different people at different establishments. Thanks! Accompany your morning treating with a Halloween wish.
8 Funny Replies To "Hahaha" Text Better Responses Nothing much. Maybe you have a mountain of laundry and it takes the whole weekend, or you are just doing the laundry inbetween other activities. Or is there a better way to handle this? Call me. Does *your* phone not work? But why would you feel entitled to her time to help with party favors for a party youre throwing? I also think that most of the people I hang out with get this, and with the exception of more formal plans, would agree. Thankfully, the discomfort is mostly on my end at this point. 96 views, 2 likes, 0 loves, 0 comments, 2 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from J.Cano: Law & Order: SVU - Best Episode Sometimes I think if Im going to make something up it might as well be along the lines of going to the moon or whatever. Its totally true that you can opt out of those things. Person A: Im fine. Id like to leave you with a couple of last thoughts to consider: One is that you say she has reacted to, We are going to by hearing a command and responding accordingly. Trust issues and controlling family? Answer with small truths. The conversation can go like this either way and be appropriate and you not be on the spot either way. People here are talking about changing a norm, but you have in fact learned the norm correctly, and Im sure this whole conversation feels like slipping sand beneath your feet. Rock on, Helen. They were being blunt and probably didnt realize the pressure I felt to say yes to direct requests, and didnt understand why I felt hurt when, upon working up the courage to ask for something directly, it was turned down. But Im willing to bet that LW knows that, and the reason he/she feels annoyed with the people asking it in his/her life are because theres a pattern and something bigger at work like maybe people trying to get him/her to do stuff, or, as he/she noted, people who want to hang out, but with him/her doing all the planning work. Maybe we could get together. This sentence should never be solo. Im well aware of that risk. Another example: My parents both corrected their local accents to American Standard Television English long before I was born, so I grew up with that accent myself. Crossword puzzles, chess, sudoku, or other puzzle games Cooking Travel Gardening Art, music, crafts, writing, podcasting If the asker tends to demand stuff from me, Im likely to claim Ill be busy.
What are your plans for the weekend? - Making Sense of English Id also add that when youve lived in a place for years and are planning to stay, like I am in my husbands home country, it gets very tiring to have everyone assume youre just visiting or that youre an international student and will be gone soon. I think my own culture is more ask-y, but I had a pretty pushover personality and often felt, well, pushed around by the people around me. You can say "because you're too hideous" or "because you're too old." (via Shutterstock) 7. She could NOT grasp that she was experiencing a cultural difference and the question wasnt going to stop because a) people were genuinely curious and/or wanted to show they were interested in her as a person and b) she was living in a part of the country where small talk was expected and people would consider it rude NOT to ask that question. Skip the part where you say Ill have to check my calendar or even Im not surejust go ahead and ask them what they have in mind! Funny Bumble Answers #4: Ironic, Nerdy-Cute Guy Ze might, but you dont actually need an excuse to not provide free labor on demand. You are doing things and going places. Which has been said in other comments and is important enough to say again. It shows that you're a calm and cool person who is easy to talk to and has no problem whether someone says hey or hello. 1. Be polite. So the LWs anger at nosy questions is more than justified. Evenings and weekends may take us a little bit longer. Good, the colors on the leaves are amazing (in Fall) Just ask! Detailing the event and a specific date is best. What about you?. Its great that you can come!. COME TO LOOSE PLAN HANGOUT THING THAT IM INVOLVED IN OR ELSE YOU MIGHT SHRIVEL AND DIE! and they had the best intentions. You have to answer the . It avoids (in their mind) making the person feel pressured to commit if they dont actually want to. Honestly, about 90% of *soft* invitations to me fall flatly to the ground because I dont pick up the work of planning, timing and reissuing that invitation. There are several possible moves in response to this gambit. I have one dear friend in particular that has the busiest social life I know. If you want to push them to just say why they want to know, ask. But I think its disingenuous? You're very welcome. Not least of which, I never felt obligated to pick up on any of his hints ever again. Are you asking where are you from of every person you meet the first time, or only of those whose appearance/accent makes you suspect they are not from your locality? My white mom has a very unusual first name (I dont know of anyone with a name that is even similar, AND its spelled with a non-English character) and, 40 years after she moved to the US people still ask her where shes from. I agree with you based on what shes told me, it feels very othering, and she resents it. Here are 11 ways how to respond to what are you doing when your crush/partner asks: 01 "I'm just here thinking about you." This is a cute response that will let your crush/partner feel special because you're letting him/her know that he/she is on your mind. Yep, my wife and I too. I never thought about the fact that some people might be actually trying to relieve the pressure! I didnt realize it until I noticed they were running a long-term experiment when they traveled of noting responses they said they like Canada and big chunks of northern and western US, because if they say theyre British, no one bats an eye despite their obvious Polish accents. People hinting around leading up to asking for dates: Pretty much the same deal, only much more dangerous. Be here at 6.. Answer vaguely. So nowadays Ill say something like Im probably going to do [X], but thats not urgent if you want to hang out instead! or I need to do [X] but I have time for a quick dinner if youre interested. (People who are not the boything get oh, Ive got laundry because theres almost nobody else Im willing to make same-day plans with. I think theres some ask culture vs. guess culture stuff in here too? It is really really worth it for people in all possible situations to understand being ethical as something you need to work on and not as something you already are by default and need no guidance and no dialogue for.
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